What causes some Gentiles who visit my congregation to be disappointed with us? Only three things.  First, they can experience disappointment when we lead them to expect something they do not receive.  Second they can experience disappointment when they receive something unexpected, unpleasant, and unwelcome.   Third, they can experience disappointment when they harbor expectations at variance with what they find with us.

How should we prevent and/or deal with their disappointment?  First, matching the first variety above, we must always be clear ourselves and clear with others as to who we are/what kind of community we are. At my congregatioin, I have added this phrase to our mission statement, which appears in our bulletin and which I repeatedly discuss in our announcements time:  "We are a family friendly community of Jews and Intermarrieds."   We not only have this written, but will also shortly have other documents which people can pick up at our literature site, and which make such things plain, as we will do in private conversation and public discourse as well. 

Second, as to receiving something unexpected and unwelcome, we must always endeavor to be courteous and not rude to Gentiles who visit us, while at the same time being truthful as to our identity.  This means getting clear on our communal identity ourselves, and training and policing people as to how they discuss such matters with Gentile visitors. Some people cannot be trusted to do this well, and need to be prevented from offending others due to their unawareness and style.

Third, when some Gentiles come, as they will, with their own preferred sense of what Messianic Judaism and Messianic Jewish congregations are, they will be disappointed that we don't treat them or regard them accordingly. However, we must learn to not be in the least bit ashamed about their disappointment: we did not create it-they did, or other congregations and associations did--by harboring expectations we were never designed to meet.  It is like a someone being disappointed that a vegetarian restaurant doesn't have steak on its menu.  The problem is not with the restaurant, and although the waiter or manager can be sympathetic with a client's disappointment, they must never and need never feel guilty about it. 

There is a place for some Gentiles in a Messianic Jewish congregation (besides the intermarried), but the key questions, in addition to those posted in my earlier blog posting on the matter, are these: How does this person help us to honor our identity and achieve our goals as "A family-friendly community of Jews and Intermarrieds?  How do they help us function as the Messianic Jewish Remnant, a sign, demonstration, and catalyst of God's consummating purposes for the descendants of Jacob?   Gentiles who are not helping us get these jobs done serve as a hindrance to their accomplishment.  This is especially so since it is only natural that they will invite other Gentile friends to likewise attend, and when that happens, our congregation is rapidly demographically overwhelmed. Then our congregation would cease to be or become what it has been called to be.

For us to passively allow this to happen is nothing short of disobedience. And to set Gentiles up for disappointment by not being clear as to who we are is, in the end, cruel.

Recently I received a letter inquiring about my views on Torah observance for Gentiles, and Gentile participation in Messianic Jewish congregations.  Here is an edited version of what I said. 

Although the Torah has applications for Gentiles in the moral realm, and in terms of principles of life, clearly the Torah was given to Israel.  As Deuteronomy states, "Moses charged us with a law, A possession for the assembly of Jacob” (33:4).  (See also Ps 147:19-20; Dt 4:5-9). Acts 21:17-26 demonstrates that first century Jewish Yeshua believers assumed they, and not Gentiles, had a responsibility to keep Torah, and Paul associates Torah keeping with those who are ritually circumcised, that is, Jews (Gal 5:3).  Richard Bauckham, professor of New Testament studies at St. Mary's College, University of St. Andrews, Scotland, and an expert on Yeshua’s family, states, “As far as we can tell, the vast majority of Jewish Christians in the NT period continued to observe the whole law, taking for granted that they were still obligated to do so.” This was not so of Gentile Christians, a fact ignored by proponents of Torah observance for Gentiles. 

My congregation is a family-friendly community of Jews and Intermarrieds. Gentiles not intermarried who are members of my congregation are a distinct minority, and must be people with a demonstrated calling to and involvement with the Jewish people, and not just those who "love the feasts," who want to keep the Sabbath and Torah.   

When Gentiles presume that Torah is as much given to them as to the Jews, it fosters a reverse supersessionism:  if everyone is a de facto Jew, then the Jews lose their distinctive and disappear as a distinct people.  This is contrary to the Bible and to the will of God.  It is also contrary to the liturgy of Jewish prayer which highlights the distinctiveness of the descendants of Jacob.  Congregations that are majority Gentile, with Gentiles who keep Torah in their fashion, cease to be a sign, demonstration and catalyst of God's consummating purposes for the descendants of Jacob.  Jews find such congregations cultish. 

Recently I heard a leader whom I respect suggest that the following questions be used with Gentiles who seek membership in Messianic Jewish congregations.  These questions reflect his conviction that most Gentiles who want to bond with the Messianic Movement do so out of unresolved conflict with the Church, or out of a naive assumption that Messianic Judaism is the more perfect religion for all. 

1. Do you believe in the basic legitimacy of the Church, in its many varieties, when it confesses the historic creeds; that its celebrations and sacraments are legitimate?

2. Do you believe that Gentiles have a different relationship to the Torah than Jews and are not responsible as Jews for the Jewish patterns of life within the Mosaic revelation but only responsible for the universal ethical teachings of Torah as also expressed an applied in New Covenant teaching?

3. Do you believe that as a Gentile believer in Yeshua, joining a Messianic Jewish congregation, you have a special calling to the Jewish people but reject the view that the Messianic Jewish congregation is a more ideal form of congregational life for all?

What do you think?